Warning: this post contains spoilers for Portal
Fans of the video game Portal are certain to get this reference! The promise of a delicious slice of Portal cake by the game’s antagonist GLaDOS is first introduced in the original game.
An incentive for Chell to pass through the robot’s test chambers, the famous cake has sparked numerous memes (Though hearing “the cake is a lie!” can get quite exhausting).
It can finally be seen at the end of Portal in a room surrounded by Personality Cores and the adorable Companion Cube.
Not only that, but the game gives you the recipe for the Portal cake (which is along the lines of a black forest gateau). It can be found on several computer screens and the Intelligence Core will recite the recipe during the battle with GLaDOS.
On a whim, I attempted to make the cake and it came out very moist but the biggest trouble I had was making sure it didn’t collapse on me. Also sourcing a perfectly white candle was tricky!
Ingredients (Three lists)
Cake:
85g self-raising flour
100g granulated sugar
55g cocoa powder
1 teaspoon salt
120mls buttermilk
110g vegetable shortening (Frytex)
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
120ml Kirsch (cherry liqueur)
Filling:
60ml Kirsch
700mls heavy cream for whipping
30g icing sugar
3 tablespoons cocoa
For the Garnish:
1 chocolate bar, frozen so it’s easier to grate
At least 8 maraschino cherries (take off the stems)
One lovely white candle
Directions:
1) Preheat oven to 175°C.
2) Grease two 8-inch cakepans or you can line them with baking paper.
3) Sift the flour, cocoa and salt.
4) In a separate bowl, beat the shortening and sugar together until they are fluffy. Add the eggs and the vanilla and continue to beat thoroughly.
5) Slowly add the flour mixture to the sugar mix
N.B. You need to add in the buttermilk as you’re doing this too but do it steadily and beat until combined.
6) Pour the batter into the cake pans.
7) Bake for about 35 or 40 minutes. But keep an eye on it. You can check to see if it’s done by using a skewer or wooden matchstick that comes out clean when inserted into the cake. If ready, let the cake cool completely.
After the cake has cooled:
1) Cut each cake layer in half (horizontally). You want a total of four layers. Soak each layer with the Kirsch.
2) Beat the cream with the icing sugar until it thickens.
3) Set a small amount of the cream/sugar mixture aside (for garnish).
4) Mix the cocoa powder into the remaining whipped cream. This is to be your frosting!
5) Find a suitable serving dish and start layering the cake. Place one cake layer on the serving dish and spread enough whipped cream on the layer (you need to cover 3 layers in total and enough for the top and sides).
6) Add the second cake layer on top of the first and repeat spreading the cream mixture.
7) Add the third cake layer and do the same as above.
8) Top with the final layer!
9) Use the remaining frosting for the top and sides of the cake.
10) Grate the chocolate onto the cake and add them gently to the sides too OR you can get chocolate sprinkles to add/smash some chocolate up and add it to the cake.
11) Use the small amount of whipped cream you set aside and place eight small circles around the top of the cake. Top with your cherries on each blob.
18) Place a white candle in the centre and light it up! Wahey!
(Lead image via Instructables)